Christmas came a day early for Americans this year, as the Senate voted down the Republican filibuster in order to permit full consideration of the "Patient Protection and Affordable Care" Act a bit after midnight. The last time the Senate voted on Christmas eve day was in 1895, when the issue was whether or not to provide federal benefits to U.S. military servicemen. I assume that the people we now call "Republicans," but back then probably were Southern democrats--anyhow, the same group that provides the core of ongoing political racism and opposition to federal government actions of any beneficial sort--were the "againsters" then as well. (Although I don't know that for sure; perhaps I will try to look it up).
I am so over this trip and I am not even gone yet.
Someone peed on my camera bag. A cat. I am pretty sure I know which one and this time it wasn't one of mine. *sigh* The bigger issue lies in that my next best bag to use as a makeshift camera bag was the Ogio laptop backpack that Neil had given to me, that I gave back to him because I wasn't using it and one of his cats had peed on his (to the point of no return...his bag got thrown away). (Are you seeing a trend here with the bags?) Anyway...and now that backpack is already in New Orleans...with Neil.
ARGH!!!!
On to other things...
My left leg is killing me and is accompanied by a nasty rash that flares up at random intervals and has for a couple years now. (Yes, I know I should have had this looked at sooner...I hate going to the doctor. Period. Don't hassle me on that.) While I was out and about today I finally went to the urgent care clinic near my house and had it looked at. Or rather, had my suspicions confirmed...I have shingles. Gross, huh? They are caused by the same virus that gives us chicken pox (i.e. if you've had the chicken pox, you could get shingles...neat huh?) They don't really know why the flareups occur other than they seem to be triggered by stress or when the immune system is otherwise compromised. For instance, I am guessing the holiday stress, mixed with work stress, mixed with fighting off a cold is what triggered this bout. Also I find heat and humidity bothers mine a lot. There is no cure. It is not contagious, with the exception that I could give chicken pox to someone who has never had them. So I have to be extra careful around smaller kids, etc. but only while I have the rash, it isn't contagious at all when dormant and is even nearly impossible to detect in testing unless active.
Usually, this shows up in people over 60 (something like only 2% of people get it at my age, however, they say that 1 in 2 people who have had chicken pox will deal with it before they die)...the problem is that there is a possible side symptom that can come with it...severe nerve pain that does not always go away after the rash heals...and that is what finally drove me to the doctor this time. My leg is KILLING me and it seems to be getting worse each time this shows up. Unfortunately, the doc I saw today was of the ultra conservative mind bent...and since this was my first trip in to get this diagnosed, told me to stick with taking extra large doses of ibuprofen for the time being and see how things are in a few weeks. Seriously? I look like I am addicted to pain killers and am coming there to get a random Rx that I don't need?
I am so frustrated. And scared. And embarrassed. On the flip side, I am SO grateful that this didn't manifest in its usual place of a band around the torso...essentially right where a bra would wrap around a woman's body under the breast. It only effects one side of the body or the other (left or right) because it is nerve driven and they are divided down the center of the body. I cannot imagine having to put any kind of restrictive clothing over this...I don't know how women survive that. I would have to get ultra skinny so I could just go without the bar (or teleport myself back to the 60's where no one cared. LOL) Anyway, luckily, for me it is a band/patch on the back of my thigh which sucks for sitting for long periods of time, but I can usually find a way to prop up my leg so there is no pressure on the back of it.
I am really struggling to wrap my head around the fact that I will be dealing with this until I die. When I get back (after new years and all) I am going to search for a good general practitioner who can either help me manage this or refer me to a specialist who can. If I am already having nerve pain issues now, I can't imagine what it is going to be like in another 15 years.
One more thing to add to the list of why I am not looking forward to being squashed in a plane seat for two hours (or more) tomorrow. I guess at least I am not trying to fly all the way home. Heh. So there you have it. My dark, dirty little secret.
I am going to go drink a beer and cry some more now.
I wrote this in August this year:
Much has happened in my little life. Lots of loss but the Lord has been faithful and I'm anchored and closer to Him than ever. I have good friends and a loving family that have been supportive throughout.
My Dad died a year ago August 4th....
My Mom died just a few weeks ago, July 12th. Her first symptom was in March and now she's gone. A measure of comfort I have is that Mom and Dad are together. Mom smiled at something/someone/s when she died. As if she was smiling at us by her bedside and beyond at something very, very wonderful. I think she may have been greeted by my Dad. I'll have to ask when I see them again. I KNOW my Mom is more than fine. That gives me the strength to carry on here
I've lost both my parents in less than a years time. Wow, never would I have thought I'd be in this position. You just never know in this life. They were both in their mid-60's.
Life is a gift. Thank you, Lord, for the loving relationship I had with both my parents. The grief I feel is a result of the love we shared. I'm thankful. Yet, I cry not for them, but for me.
Just lost a good friend this week to a motorcycle accident. She was so supportive to both me and my Mom these last several months. She brought goodies when she visited Mom and enough to feed visitors and staff too. She prayed with and for me and my family. That is valuable and cherished. The last text message I got from her was the evening before her accident. She simply texted 'Praying for you'. She had a big heart and was an encouraging sister in Christ. I will miss the connection we shared of her being there for me concerning Mom. That was a comfort to me. She started out a Vox neighbor and became an offline friend.
In the midst of this incredible loss I feel peace. I don't know what tomorrow will bring but thankful for the peace I have today.
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Today, December 23rd, I just want to let you know that my sweet Grandmother joined my Mom, Dad, Glenda, and many loved ones when she died to this life on October 16th. I miss them all so much. Many here used to pray for the situation with my Grandmother and with my Dad. That's why I'm posting here in the off chance some may see this. If any of you are on Facebook, let me know and I'd love to stay connected with you over there.
I wish those who read this a very blessed Christmas and a new year filled with love and joy.
I haven't posted for a week or so, being so busy with Christmas preparations. Our first holiday-related company may arrive today, on their way west to Vancouver. Christmas eve will be spent in Chicago (that's our big meal and gathering). Probably on Christmas day itself we will work on slightly overdue Christmas greeting cards.
Of course there was something missing and forgotton with this stupid trip...I am blaming the stupid snow/ice on Friday night. Sadie's bordatella vaccination had expired and thus I was supposed to take her in to the vet Saturday morning. But with the weather insanity and then plans with Neil to go see the movie, I completely forgot.
Thank goodness the lady who owns the kennel is awesomely (this seems to be my new word as of late) on top of things and called me today to tell me according to her records she needed the vaccine. So, I rushed her over to the vet for the shot...while there, I also discovered that somehow I missed her annual physical this summer. So we did that too with the usual work-ups and tests and shots and what have you.
Ugh.
So, that's even fewer keepsakes coming home with me from the trip...or whatever. I am so frustrated at this point I don't even care anymore. ARGH.
Also, my left leg is killing me. *sigh* That is another entry for another day. I am scared about what I think the cause is and I need to get my thoughts sorted out sometime soon. Nothing life-threatening, but soemthing that could drastically effect me as I age. One of these days I will go see a doctor about it, not that there is too much to be done about it.
Wow. For real...it's this week. So hard to believe.
I am stressing out about the trip to New Orleans. Thank goodness that I don't have gift madness to deal with too. I got Caleb's sent directly to my mom's house and am not doing anything for anyone else. So there.
1/2 day of work tomorrow morning and then it is vacation time through the weekend. That is somewhat of a relief...a couple days will get to be spent at home.
*sigh*
Really, I am going to miss being with the critters for the holiday. I hate that the dogs will be at the kennel and I hope the cats don't totally destroy the house...four days is about their max by themselves. Heh. I guess we'll see. Unfortunately, I have no vacation time when we return, so I seriously hope I don't have any major messes to clean up. It is bad enough to jump right back into work with "vacation" laundry and stuff to do too.
Yes, I am bitching. This trip is looming at me like some sort of monster out of a bad dream. Only I am not waking up and it is not going away. It will have to be dealt with when it gets here, I guess.
Yesterday, I went for a long run. Before I set off, I wasn't sure how far I'd go, I hoped for at least 20 miles.
That day was overcast with no wind and the high temperature would be 43. We haven't had temps that high for almost two weeks so it felt like a heat wave.
Only a mile from our house a neighbor parked her pickup on the road. She opened her truck door and her black lab promptly charged me.
He didn't stop, despite my yell. He kept coming, barking and growling. As he jumped on me with mouth open and teeth bared, I kneed him HARD. He grunted as my knee connected with his soft underbelly. Then, he fell back about six feet with the wind knocked out of him.
Lucky for him, he was smart enough to jump up, turn and run back to his owner. Had he decided to continue, I might have had no other choice but to take it up to a level 4 response. (level 1 = strong words or yelling, level 2 = throwing rocks or spraying pepper spray, level 3 = physically defending oneself, level 4 = well, l'll just say that after a level 4 response, no dog ever repeats their behavior again).
The owner then proceeded to yell and berate me for "beating up her dog."
I yelled right back and told her "What the #$%#% was I supposed to do?! Wait until he bit me?!?!?!"
She then apologized. She admitted her dog is kind of a bully (no kidding!) and said he can tell when people are afraid of him (Well, he certainly didn't read me correctly, I wasn't afraid of him).
What kind of stupid dog runs towards a person growling with teeth bared and jumps on them ?
A bully who hasn't had anyone teach them that running full speed towards someone growling and then jumping up with teeth bared is never acceptable. I have no problem with a dog standing at the end of his driveway letting me know that it is his territory and I should not enter. I also don't have a problem with a dog coming up to politely smell me. But I do have a problem with unprovoked attacks.
I've been chased, nipped, bit, attacked and treed by many dogs in my life. Long ago, I promised myself to never allow myself to be bullied or attacked by any dog or pack of dogs ever again. Of course, I now also run prepared, in the event that I have no other choice but to defend myself.
Anyway, after she apologized, I apologized too (though I think she didn't deserve my apology) and we introduced ourselves. There are better ways to meet the neighbors than after kneeing their dog when it charges you.
I continued my run. At Ghost Canyon, instead of turning left and heading on my usual route towards Mt. Rushmore, I turned right towards the town of Keystone. Playhouse Road is rolling through the Black Hills National Forest with many switchbacks, much altitude gain/loss and practically no shoulder. Fortunately, there were few vehicles.
I saw a HUGE female golden eagle swoop low over the trees. I stopped running and watched her glide silently. The wingspan of golden eagles average over 7 feet in width.
What a powerful, beautiful majestic bird!
Seeing this eagle, I was both inspired and humbled. I thought to myself: "No matter what else I see or experience today, being out here and seeing her has made my run worth it."
As the eagle disappeared over a ridge, I said quietly under my breath: "Mitakuye oyasin" and continued my run.
At highway 40, I turned east and headed home. A few miles from home, I called Jeanne and Nathan to tell them I was on my way.
Finally, as the sun set low on the horizon, I walked the last half mile up our snow covered drive. I looked at my GPS: 24.3 miles. One good run!
This morning, I have only a few areas of trace muscle soreness, but nothing that will keep me from our day's chores: cutting firewood.
It is amazing what the human body can accomplish with training, time and dedication. Only 6 years ago, I would have been extremely sore and had trouble walking after only 10 or 12 mile run. 24 miles is now a nice relaxed weekend jog for me. I could do it again today.
Run on and run well!
